All I Want for Christmas is You
by SparklingTwilight
Summary: He wants just one thing for Christmas. Ten years after having her heart broken, Bella's created a new life for herself in NY. Will a chance encounter with a familiar face convince her it's time to finally come home for the holidays?AGUtM o/s contest entry


**A/N: This was written by me as part of a Twi-Fic One-Shot gift exchange between a few fandom friends of mine and myself, but I ended up getting an idea for a different one. This story had been sitting idle in my document folder for the better part of two weeks, having had no idea what to do with it anymore, and then one of my fandom friends suggested I submit it for the Anything Goes Under the Mistletoe O/S contest. I hope you all enjoy it and tell me what you think of it ^_^ Merry Christmas!**

**The Sandbox Presents: Anything Goes Under the Mistletoe**

**Author: SparklingTwilight**

**Story Title: All I Want for Christmas...Is You**

**Rating: T**

**Vamp or Human: All Human**

**Number of Words (not including A/N or header/footer): 7731**

**Disclaimer: Any and all Twilight related or referenced materials herein belong solely to SMeyer. No finacial gain was made and no copyright infringement was intended while writing this. **

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All I Want for Christmas...Is You

Have you ever just suddenly stopped, opened your eyes to look around, and wondered...

'_What in the world am I doing here_?'

That's exactly what it was like for Bella one Christmas Eve as she sat with an almost empty glass of champagne, at an empty table draped in luxurious gold linens and set with the finest of china and crystal dinnerware. In the center of the table sat an iron tiered votive holder, surrounded by a beautiful wreath crafted from frosted balsam pine branches and adorned with sprigs of glittered cranberry bunches, sparkling ornaments, and shimmering poinsettia flowers.

The entire ballroom had been transformed into a holiday wonderland that radiated merriment and joy...both of which Bella had been completely unable to feel herself since she'd lost her father.

It had been five years since Charlie had passed shortly before Christmas. He'd had a heart attack while shoveling their elderly neighbor's driveway for them in the early morning hours so they'd be able to get to church on time. She'd blamed herself for months afterwards for not being there for him...for having not been there for him ever since she'd left for college. She missed her father greatly, and often wished she could turn back the hands of time and soak up every last minute of time with him that she could instead of being naive enough to believe he'd always be there when she was ready to return. _If_ she had ever been ready to return after..._he'd _broken her heart.

Even after ten years, she still couldn't _think _of his name without feeling like the hole in her chest would tear her in half instantly.

She looked around the ballroom and sighed heavily as she brought the champagne flute up to her lips once more. As she sipped, she enviously studied the couples dancing and holding each other in loving embraces as they smiled at each other, stepping in time to the various Christmas songs being played softly through the speakers.

Those who weren't dancing were gathered in groups, conversing joyously with their loved ones and friends. Laughter rang out in the air, bringing her attention to a group in the corner who just realized they were standing under a bundle of mistletoe. The entire ceiling was randomly dotted with crimson ribbons dangling the bright green bundles with white berries in the air. The joyous people were all smiles and holiday cheer as they kissed each other on the cheeks and moved out from under it.

She sighed once again as she looked around her empty table forlornly and downed the remainder of her champagne, asking herself, yet again, what she was doing there.

A month ago, she wouldn't have even considered attending the function. A month ago, she wouldn't have even considered returning to Forks _at all _during the holiday season. She would have stayed in her cozy, undecorated and cheerless, apartment in New York City. She probably would have just buried herself in work, catch up on everything she'd been falling behind in at Newton Industries.

Her boss, Michael, was a rotten thorn in her side. She'd been hired as a legal consultant, sought after by his father was more like it, but somewhere along the lines she'd become more of a personal assistant to his son. The man couldn't make a _single_ decision without her input on the matter.

It was as if he had no brain of his own some days, and it was the main reason behind why she quite often found herself sitting in her apartment until the wee hours of the morning trying to catch up on her actual job responsibilities. That is, when he wasn't calling her home phone in the middle of the night to ask asinine questions like "_Are mud masks or seaweed masks healthier for your skin_?" or "_Does a black shirt or a blue one go better with my gray Armani suit? I have an interview with GQ in the morning and I need to look my best. Which cufflinks go with that jacket?_"

He was insufferable, but her overly generous salary compensated for her burdens...most days. She often wondered if his father paid her so much because he knew what she'd have to endure while working with him.

Sitting at the table, feeling invisble and acknowledging that she truly was utterly _alone_ in all aspects of her life, she couldn't help but wonder why she had even agreed to attend an event such as this. She sighed once again and forced a smile of gratitude at the waiter who offered her a fresh glass of champagne. Taking her empty one from the table, he left her to her thoughts of just a month prior.

She'd been coming home from a very long and tiring day at the office and, on a whim, had decided to stop by a corner coffee shop near her building that made a divine marble mocha macchiato. She'd known she'd need the caffeine to get through the stack of project proposals that needed to be handed in to the city officials first thing the following Monday morning.

As she'd entered the coffee shop, the bells above the door alerted the staff and patrons to her arrival and she'd quickly ducked her head as she made her way to the counter. She'd just opened her mouth to place her order when someone had gasped and stuttered her name, causing her mouth to snap shut as her brow furrowed. She'd turned instantly, wondering who it could have been that would have known her as she didn't have any friends outside of the office, and they couldn't even really be considered anything more than associates. Her breath had caught in her throat as her eyes landed on a person she hadn't seen in years.

"Bella! My god, I haven't seen you in forever!" Alice had squealed as she nearly toppled her chair over and launched herself toward Bella.

Bella had managed to pick her jaw up off the floor as she was almost knocked to the ground by one of her best friends from what seemed like a lifetime ago. Her mind was reeling from the impossibility of the random encounter, but she'd managed to form at least one coherent thought that instantly spilled from her lips.

"Alice...what are you doing here?"

Realizing how her blurted words must have sounded, she'd forced a laugh and shook her head.

"I mean...in New York? It's great seeing you, I'm just...how? Last I heard you were living in Seattle."

"I am," Alice had smiled brilliantly. "Jasper and I are here on vacation...well it's more work related for me than it is a vacation, but he came along with me."

"Jasper's here?" Bella gasped, her eyes darting around the small coffee house but not seeing his once familiar face.

"Well he's in New York, but he's...um...he's visiting some old friends because Lexi, my assistant, and I had to attend a fashion show."

Bella had thought it was strange the way she seemed hesitant to answer, but she'd shrugged it off, figuring it wasn't any of her business.

"That's great, Ali. I hope you guys take some time to see all the sights this city has to offer while you're here. Maybe we can get together and do dinner one night," Bella offered as she smiled, hoping her offer didn't come off as insincere or forced.

She really had wanted to get together with Alice and Jasper. It had been years since she'd really had anyone in her life outside of her co-workers, and she was tired of feeling so lonely and empty all the time. The truth was, outside of her career, her life had been devastatingly devoid of anything fulfilling.

Alice had eyed her with a heartbreaking expression and a slight frown before she wrapped her arms around Bella and held her tightly.

"I've missed you, Bella. We _all_ have," she'd said, stressing the one word in a way that made Bella believe she wasn't just talking about their group of friends, but possibly something, or some_one_ more accurately, that had once meant the world to her.

She couldn't bring herself think about that possibility. Tears had sprung into her eyes as she forced herself to remember the reason she'd traveled so far from home for school and had made it a point to rarely return. _He_ was the reason she'd been unable to fully allow anyone else into her broken and iced over heart for the last decade.

"I've missed you too, Ali," she'd responded, hugging her tighter as her voice broke at the end.

When they broke apart, Bella ordered her marble mocha macchiato and followed behind Alice to sit with her and catch up for a while. They reminisced over fond memories of the past, and told each other of what they've been up to in the years they hadn't been in contact. When they spoke of their current lives, Bella didn't have much to say and the absence of happiness in her voice broke Alice's heart.

She'd wanted so much more for her best friend. It didn't matter that they'd been estranged for so very long, she still saw Bella as her best friend and sister in her eyes and heart. She always would be. Just as another certain someone, who's life had been just as heartbreakingly devoid of true happiness over the years, would always be her dear friend and brother. She'd wondered for years if things would have been different for the both of them if he could have just been honest with both himself and her years ago.

"Listen, my parents are hosting their annual holiday ball on Christmas Eve. I know it's kind of last minute to spring this on you, being that it's only a month away, but I'd love it if you came. Emmett and Rosalie will be there, and I know they'd love to see you. We've all missed you, Bells. It's hasn't been the same without you."

"Alice, you know why I left, and I'm sorry that I didn't stay in contact very well. I tried, but it just hurt so damn much that I couldn't keep putting myself through it."

Sharp pangs had ripped through her heart as Bella looked at her friend sorrowfully. Anything and everything that had something to do with _him_ caused her heart to constrict in agony.

Even a decade later.

"I know, honey. We've never blamed you, but it's been ten years, Bella. It's time to move on and find happiness in your life. That's all we want for you, and we'd love to be a part of your life again."

As Alice spoke, a plan began to form in her mind. She hadn't been sure if it would work, but she knew it was worth the shot. Bella deserved to be happy, and Alice wanted to do everything in her power to make this Christmas memorable for her friend.

"Is he going to be there?" Bella had asked warily.

"Edward hasn't attended in years. Not since..." Alice had trailed off as she shifted uncomfortably, knowing she had to tread lightly.

"Since what, Alice?" Bella had asked, ignoring the agony hearing his name had caused to rip through her heart. Alice cleared her throat as she lifted her chai tea, and answered rapidly as she brought the cup to her lips.

"Not since he transferred to John Hopkins University seven years ago."

"Oh."

Alice shifted uncomfortably in her seat again as she took in Bella's hurt expression, hating that she'd had to withhold the truth of the situation from her friend, but knowing it hadn't been her place to give it.

Another sharp pang rang through Bella's heart, knowing that he'd been just two states away from her for the last few years and he hadn't tried to contact her. Not that she could have faulted him for it, as she hadn't tried to either. There had been times, a large number of them, where she'd picked up a phone and halfway dialed his parent's old number only to hang up.

It had been so long since she'd last seen him, and their last encounter hadn't gone very well at all...for either of them. She had figured that by being away from him, somehow, she would manage to get over him, but she never had. Bella wasn't sure if she'd be able to handle hearing how perfect his life was, how he'd gotten married to the love of his life and had a family and great career, without crumbling to pieces. Worse than any of that, she feared he'd tell her he hadn't thought of her _at all _over the years.

By no means was it that she'd wished he hadn't found happiness in life, because she most certainly had wanted that for him. She just didn't think her heart could withstand hearing about it when she feared she was destined to spend her life pining for someone who would never love her.

Sitting there in the small, quaint coffee shop, Bella had come to the realization that she couldn't keep on living the way she had been. She needed something other than just her career in her life because with each passing day, she'd been slipping further and further into depression. It had already tangled its threads around her and she knew if things continued the way they had been, it would pull her under. Her biggest fear was that she'd never be able to resurface again once that happened.

Bella wasn't sure what made her say it, but she ultimately agreed to attend the ball. Alice had clapped excitedly, and the sight of it made Bella smile genuinely for the first time in forever. It had felt good to her to have a part of her past back in her life; a part of what had, at one point in time, made her feel happy and complete. She'd hoped that maybe by reconnecting with some of the others, she wouldn't feel so god forsakenly alone all the time - even if they were physically separated by thousands of miles.

Love had escaped her in life, but with friends - and with friends that she loved dearly at that - she hoped she could find some resemblance of happiness in her life.

"I'm _so_ glad I ran into you," Alice had said as she embraced her one last time in the chilly wind outside the coffee shop.

"Me too, Ali. I promise I'll keep in touch this time."

"You better or I'll hunt you down now that I know where you live!" Alice had giggled. They'd embraced one more time before heading off in separate directions.

What Bella hadn't seen was when Alice had turned the corner, she'd quickly pulled out her cell phone and hit the speed dial number for Jasper's cell. She'd glanced behind her when Jasper answered and a wide grin had crossed her lips.

"Are you still with Edward?"

"Yeah...why?" he'd answered.

"You'll _never _guess who I just ran into..."

Two weeks later, Bella had arrived home to find a giant package sitting in front of her door. One look at the return address and she knew it was from Alice. When she'd opened it, she found a simple paper folded in half and containing a note written in her bubbly scrawl.

_Don't thank me, just wear it to the ball. It'll look spectacular on you. _

_See you under the mistletoe,_

_Alice_

That's how she found herself two weeks later, arriving at the festively decorated banquet hall, wrapped in a shimmering wine colored dress made of the softest silk that flowed over her skin like water. It was beautiful in its design with a cowl neckline, fitted bodice that cinched in the back, and had champagne beaded lace trim at the waist.

Stepping out of the limo that Alice had sent to retrieve her from the hotel just outside of Forks, she felt beautiful for the first time since _he'd _told her she was breathtaking at her senior prom. He'd returned from college in Seattle just to escort her to the school function, and she was positive that night that he felt something for her that was more than friendship, just as she did for him; as she always had for him.

It was in the way he'd held her while they danced, the way he looked at her as the lights twinkled above them, and in the way he seemed to not want the night to end. She'd been sure of it, but was too shy to ask him.

Two months later, when he'd broken her heart, the only thing she was sure of was that she'd been a _fool_ to ever think he could feel for her the way she did for him.

Bella downed the rest of her second glass of champagne and set it down at the empty table with a resounding _thunk_. She let her gaze wander around the ballroom yet again as she crossed her arms over her chest and pursed her lips.

She couldn't even begin to fathom why Alice would have wanted her to attend this function when she would be too busy mingling with the guests, being a good host, to keep her company. She and Jasper had greeted Bella enthusiastically when she'd arrived, and Esme and Carlisle, her parents, had embraced her warmly. After a half an hour, their attention had been drawn to the arrival of numerous amounts of guests and Bella had smiled politely as she shooed them all away to greet them.

None of them had returned since.

She sarcastically wondered if she should just grab a tray of hor'derves and attempt to play the part of a server. At least it would beat sitting at an empty table, chugging champagne like a champ, as at least a hundred people thrummed with holiday cheer around her.

She sighed one last time and twirled the stem of her fluted glass between her fingers, debating attempting to sneak out unseen.

Just as she pushed her glass away and gathered her clutch from beside her place setting, Alice's Earth shattering squeal erupted through the room, drowning out all the sounds of people talking and laughing with holiday music playing in the background. As Bella's head turned in the direction of the squeal, she nearly fell out of her chair. Her heart plummeted to the floor, right along with her alcohol filled stomach, as her eyes fell on the one person she'd loved her entire life. The one person who had stolen her heart, but didn't love her in return.

_Edward. _

She wasn't sure how, but as she watched him laugh and twirl around with Alice in his arms, she _knew _she had to get out of there. There was no way she'd make it through the night without her heart shattering into a billion pieces if she watched him dancing with and lovingly embracing the beautiful blonde to his left.

Edward had barely gotten through the entry way when he'd nearly been knocked down by a blur of squealing festive green, complete with a holly clip piece in her hair and jingling bell earrings. He laughed as he swung his dear friend Alice around and hugged her tightly. He'd nearly forgotten how exuberant she could be during the holidays. He, himself, hadn't had many reasons to be merry in the last ten years. Not since he lost his best friend, the person he'd unknowingly been in love with, and had compared every woman to ever since. As hard as he'd tried to find what he'd had with her with someone else, he'd never been able to find it, and he'd come to terms with the fact that he never would years ago.

That thought caused the empty feeling in his chest to flare up, but he forced his smile to stay on his face as he set Alice down on the ground. His laugh as Alice pointed out the mistletoe was anything but genuine, but he tried his best to appear happy as he leaned to the side and kissed Tanya's cheek. She pressed her hand against the side of his face as she kissed his in return and spoke softly, and silently prayed her husband wasn't feeling desolate on this special night.

"Merry Christmas, Edward."

"Merry Christmas to you too, Tanya," he smiled as he pulled back.

He wasn't sure how he'd manage to get through the night feeling as guilty and lonesome as he had the times he'd attended and Bella hadn't ever shown. The only reason he ever even came those first three years after she left was in hopes that she would be there. The last thing he'd wanted to do when Jasper had strong armed him into agreeing to come this year, was to spend the night avoiding everyone in the room and lamenting over all he'd lost when he'd made the biggest mistake of his life...especially since Tanya had accompanied him.

Bella watched as they made their way into the room, greeting other guests and acquaintances, debating whether it was better to just slide under the table and wait until she could sneak out, or just bolt and make a run for the exit.

Edward tried to keep up the charade of holiday cheer as they greeted everyone, but as his eyes darted around the room, looking for only her, it became increasingly difficult to keep up the facade. He found himself, instead, wondering why he had even agreed to come in the first place.

That was...until he spotted what he swore had to be a hallucination, because there was _no way_ he was witnessing Bella attempt to stealthily creep toward the exit unseen. Just the _thought_ of only seeing her for a single second and having her disappear from his life again had his feet moving hastily in her direction with desperate urgency.

He fought his way through the crowd, blurting apologies as he bumped into people, but refusing to take his eyes off of her, terrified she'd vanish into thin air. He wanted to shout her name, but drawing everyone's attention to her would only make her flee faster, he was _positive_ of that.

His heart nearly gave out as she made it to the exit and didn't even spare a glance around. Her head was down, eyes to the floor in the poise of defeat he'd seen too many times from her in their lives. He knew right then she wasn't just leaving. She was _running_.

From him.

She'd seen him and ran from him.

"Bella...stay _please_." His unheard plea was directed at her back and to the heavens, but neither remained answered as she slipped through the entryway and cast just a flicker of a glance behind her before she disappeared.

Bella's heels clicked along the tiled floor as she hurriedly tossed on her coat and scarf, preparing to rush out into the blustery cold night. An unbidden sob erupted from her lips as she burst through the doors and grabbed a hold of the railing, her mind spinning dizzily with heart wrenchingly desperate thoughts.

_Why did she have to fall in love with the one person who couldn't love her back?_

_Why couldn't she have at least just found someone she could love enough to take even just some of the pain of not being able to have him away? _

_What was wrong with her that she couldn't move on with her life as he had done?_

It infuriated her because she'd _tried_. She'd tried to move on as best she could...she just failed.

The only thing her efforts had ever amounted to were one time dates that never panned out past their goodbyes, and short term relationships that reached the point of physical intimacy but lacked any degree of emotional connection. Those very few relationships hadn't lasted longer than a few weeks after she'd given into their seductions. She felt as though she were completely unworthy of love and she wanted to know _why_.

As she swiped at her eyes and took in a cleansing breath, she began making her way down the steps just as the doors she'd exited only moments before burst open, sounding for all the world as though a freight train had just rammed through them. She froze on the second to last step as her hand tightened on the rail to a painful degree. She knew who it was without even turning around. Even after ten long years, his presence ignited a current within her that pulled her towards him.

"Bella...where are you going?"

Edward was out of breath, the mix of adrenaline and anxiety making it hard for him to breathe as he literally tore down the hall and through the doors. He wasn't about to let her walk away from him _again_. He wasn't that oblivious nineteen year old boy anymore. He was a twenty nine year old man who had spent the last decade agonizing over what he'd unknowingly had within his grasp and threw away in the blink of an eye out of stupidity. He _knew_ what he'd continue to agonize over if he let her walk away again.

"Home."

Her trembling voice was barely audible. Soft and unsure as she closed her eyes and refused to turn around. She knew if she turned and looked up at him, her heart would turn to dust instantly. What she didn't know, was the soft sound that had emanated from her lips was the only sound in his world that could cause his heart to flutter and his knees to weaken, and force him to hold onto the rail as he slowly approached her. Without the strength of the sturdy rail, he'd be sure to crumble.

"You _are _home. Please...don't go."

His voice swirled around her, soothing her frayed nerves in an agonizing way because it tore at her heart that he still had such a profound effect on her. Again, it beckoned her to ask why she had to love someone so wholly when they weren't hers to love. Tears stung her eyes as her head fell and her hand clutched at the lapels of her coat above her heart.

She shook her head and looked out across the parking lot, towards the leafless trees and unyielding evergreens, both covered with snow and ice, creating the picturesque scene for two lovers to find each other at long last. She'd read something in a novel at some point in her life, and the scene before her instantly brought to memory the beautiful tale of romance.

It was the sound of his steps approaching her in the snow that reminded her it wasn't _her_ tale, and she nearly barked out a sobbing laugh at the acknowledgement of that fact, causing her shoulders to raise as she choked down the sounds of her anguish. With a steeling breath, she turned to face the final destruction of her stuttering and frail heart.

"I don't belong here."

Her words were punctuated with a sad quivering smile that both infuriated Edward and ripped his heart to shreds. She'd _always _belonged there...with _him._ Seeing the agony and longing in her gaze caused his chest to feel as though it was caving in on itself as he struggled to surface from the despair he'd been drowning in for so long. Only _she_ had the ability to save him. Without her, he'd be lost in this world forever, destined to live a life of emptiness because _she _was his happiness.

Edward reached out and tucked a small lock of her beautiful mahogany hair that had escaped stylish up-do behind her ear. The way his fingers ghosted across her jaw as he pulled his hand back sent a thrill through Bella as she closed her eyes and fought back the tears that wanted to spill from her eyes from the intensity of his gaze.

"Yes, you do." His voice rang through the air with crystal clear finality. "You've always belonged here."

Bella's eyes shot open as he grabbed a hold of her hand and stepped down the remaining few steps, tugging gently as he spoke. "Come with me."

She was bewildered, frozen on her step much like the unmoving iced over world around them, the only warmth coming from his hand on hers. She wasn't sure how much more she could take, how much she could endure before he returned inside to his wife, family, and friends, leaving her behind in the rubble of the shell of a person she'd been living as.

"Edward." His name left her lips in a rasp of searing anguish, for she hadn't spoken it in years. "Everyone will be wondering where you are. You should go back inside."

The corners of his lips lifted undetectably as he turned to look at her and spotted Alice, Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, and his parents all spying on them through the glass doors.

"I have a feeling they won't miss a thing."

"But..._your wife_..." Bella's words caught in her throat, tasting every bit as acidic as they sounded.

"Tanya isn't my wife, Bella." Edward frowned as he spoke, wishing she'd be able to see that there could never be another for him when she was all he'd dreamed of for as long as he could remember. "She's a coworker...a _friend_ at best."

He paused as he struggled with his fear that it had been too long, that too much time had passed for him to be able to fix the damage he'd caused, and waited for her to turn her gaze to him. When she finally did, both his eyes and his voice were beseeching, pleading with her to acquiesce to his request.

"_Please_, will you come with me now?"

Bella huffed, causing a burst of fog between them and allowed herself to be led away from the steps. The frigid air was nipping at her face and ears and blowing straight through the thin fabric of her gown, chilling her to the bone as he led her down a path to the back of the building. Her mind was aflutter with uncertainty, wondering what he could possibly want from her after an entire decade, and why he was so adamant that she not leave when he hadn't tried to stop her the first time she left. She felt as though she was being led to the gallows, to a private and secluded area where he'd finally finish the destruction of her withered heart.

Edward glanced over at her as they walked and found himself unable to look away. She'd always been beautiful to him in their youths, but she'd become indescribably exquisite over the years and it nearly crippled him to know how badly he'd hurt such a heavenly creature. It had never been his intention, as she was the _last_ person in the world he _ever _would have wanted to harm in any way. She'd been his best friend, his confidant...his rock. He just hadn't been aware back then that she'd been _so much more_.

"So, just a friend?"

Bella's sudden question as she lifted her head broke him of his adoring gaze. He briefly wondered if he would have ever been able to look away from her delicate angelic features if she hadn't spoken.

He stopped and turned her toward him, now that they were standing in a private area lit brightly with white twinkling lights in the trees and held both of her hands between his to warm them.

"Just a friend, Bella. We've worked together for the last two years. Her husband is in the Marines and is currently overseas. I didn't want to come here tonight alone, and I knew she'd be spending the holidays alone as well, so I asked her to accompany me. I assure you, there's nothing more to our arriving together tonight than two people who didn't wish to be alone on Christmas Eve."

Bella looked down at the ground in embarrassment as he explained his situation, and idly chewed on the inside of her lip, trying to ignore the electric current flowing from his hands into hers and up her arms. It had always been that way for her whenever he touched her. It was as if his touch brought her to life and she had often wondered if he'd ever felt it too when they were younger.

A silence passed over them, neither knowing what to do or say, but each, unbeknownst to the other, hoping for the very same thing. To be rescued from the depths of the seas of despair they'd both been drowning in. A saving grace that could only be found in the love they held for one another.

The air sizzled between them, even though the breeze whirling around them was numbingly cold.

She wanted to ask why. Why she hadn't been enough for him when she'd always been there, had always loved him more than life itself. She wanted to know what it was about her that had only ever enabled him to see her as a friend.

He wanted nothing more than to tell her how beautiful and special she was and beg her forgiveness for hurting her the way he had. If he had just realized sooner that the love he felt for her was anything but the love of a very close and dear friend, everything could have been different. _Would_ have been different.

He'd always known that she'd loved him more than what he thought she should, more than he ever felt he deserved, but he had been terrified of hurting her should he have allowed them to be more than what they were. He hadn't known that telling her he could never see her as more than just his friend would have hurt her more than he _ever _could have by giving her his heart. Giving it to her wholly the way he knew now he should have ages ago, because it had always belonged to only her, just as it always would.

When the silence was finally broken, they'd done so mutually by sighing each other's names. Encapsulated in those two words was their shared anguish and longing for each other, and it nearly buckled the pair of them under the already devastating weight of the escalating tension between them. Two broken hearts, frozen in time in a frozen world, and neither capable of enduring a second goodbye.

It was Bella that crumbled first, a sob ripping through her chest as he squeezed her hands and held onto her for dear life.

"What do you _want _from me? I gave you _everything _I had and it wasn't enough. I have _nothing_ _left_ to give. Just let me go, Edward."

Her spluttering words tore him to shreds, leaving him flayed and gasping for air as he swallowed down the lump that had risen in his throat. Even a decade later she was still in just as much pain as she was the day she'd walked away from him.

"Bella, Bella, Bella..._please_...just listen," he pleaded as she struggled to pull away from him. He clutched her to him in an iron clad embrace, physically unable to let her go until she heard him out. If, and _only_ then, she still wanted to leave, would he let her go.

"You were _more _than enough. You've _always _been more than enough for me. It's why I was so afraid to be more to you than what I already was. I couldn't bear the thought of hurting you and losing you completely if I couldn't love you just as much in return as you did, but I was stupid. _So_ goddamn stupid, because it's always been you that my heart has wanted. I'm sorry...I'm _so _sorry. Telling you I didn't care for you as anything more than a friend that night was the blackest form of blasphemy and the _biggest_ mistake I've ever made in my life. I'd give _anything _to be able to go back and take away what I've done to you...to _us_."

"Why _now_? It's been _ten years_, Edward."

He swiped away at her tears with the backs of his fingers as she gripped the lapels of his coat.

"Because I was an idiot, sweetheart. I thought I was doing the right thing in the beginning and hoped that when you realized there was someone out there better for you, you'd come back to me and I could be your friend without having to worry about hurting you. But you never came back, and it was when I realized that you weren't ever going to that I realized how false my words to you had been. It took you walking away from me for me to see the depth of my feelings for you."

He gazed into her eyes as he swiped away at the tears that continued to cascade down her cheeks and placed a tender kiss on her forehead.

"I'm in love with you, Bella. I always have been, and I know now that I always will be."

"You...you're in love...with me?" she whispered in disbelief, her eyes darting back and forth between his as her heart threatened to give out with how rapidly it was thrashing against her chest. The hope she'd been trying to smother flared up in her chest as another round of tears escaped her eyes.

"Very much so. I need you, Bella. I need you in my life, in whatever capacity you'll have me. My existence has been _entirely_ empty without you in it."

He was baring his entire soul for her to see, and she couldn't stand it anymore. Just hearing him say the words she'd longed to hear from his lips her entire life sparked a fire in her veins that warmed her entire being despite the freezing temperatures they were standing in. Her eyes closed as she gripped his coat tighter in her hands.

"Edward...please stop," she whispered as she opened her eyes and focused on his. When she spoke again, her voice was strong and unwavering. The look in his eyes was undeniably familiar. She was positive her own had looked the same way when he'd rejected her so long ago.

"I've loved you for as long as I can remember. It's never been a conscious decision or a choice that I made one day...it just..._is_. I _need _to know that when you wake up tomorrow, or a month or a year from now, that you aren't going to think you made another mistake. My heart can't take another goodbye like the last one."

Edward grasped her face between his hands and bent his head down to hers, brushing his nose against her cold and reddened one as he locked his eyes on hers.

"Loving you could _never_ be a mistake."

His words had barely finished leaving his lips before they touched hers and her eyes fluttered closed as her breath hitched and her heart stuttered before it took off at an alarmingly frantic pace. He wrapped an arm around her and drew her closer as his own eyes closed and he sighed in blissful relief as her hand threaded into his hair and her other arm wrapped around his back.

His hand cradled the back of her head delicately as he sucked her bottom lip between his own and tilted his head to deepen the kiss. Somewhere in the distance, church bells began to ring as their tongues tentatively met and twined around one another, but neither of them were aware of anything but each other.

Nothing could tear them from the salvation they'd finally found in each other, not the church bells, or the snickers and high fives of their friends and loved ones, or even the snowflakes that had begun to fall and whirl around them. In that one kiss, their decade long prayers for each other had been answered and they clung to each other as their broken hearts fused together and began to beat in unison as they became whole once again.

As they broke apart, Edward was overcome with emotion and a single tear escaped his eye as he pressed his forehead against hers. His eyes closed as a shuddering breath escaped his lungs and he held Bella tighter wishing he could somehow get the last decade of their lives back because he'd lost _so_ much time that he could have spent holding her and kissing her the way he just had. The perfection of it, of her soft lips and her sweet taste, left him speechless and short of breath.

When he opened his eyes and pulled his head back, his heart burst with joy at her love filled gaze and beautiful smile.

"It's snowing," she whispered, tilting her head up to look at the sky.

Looking into the depth of his moss green eyes, and seeing the sheer degree of emotion swirling within them proved to be too much for her after having believed for so long that he could never look at her the way she had always looked upon him. She hoped that by pointing out the obvious, she wouldn't be able to see the moment he realized he'd made another mistake in his eyes, but when she looked back at him when his silence, in turn, became too much to endure, his gaze remained just as intense.

"And you've never looked more beautiful," he replied when her eyes finally came back to his own.

One look into the depth of her chocolate and golden flecked eyes gave him the courage to ask for what he believed he could never deserve after how he'd hurt her, but he prayed that his request would be granted and silently vowed that he'd spend every single day of the rest of his life trying to erase the mistakes of his youth.

"You asked me what I wanted from you, and the only answer I have to give is forever. Forever with _you_."

Bella's heart melted as he gazed down at her with such heartbreaking adoration, and the moment finally hit her. The romantic tale she'd once read of two lovers finding each other in the midst of a snowfall, after searching for a lifetime for what they'd always had together, _paled_ in comparison to what she was currently feeling. Because unlike a fictional story, this was _real_. This was her life, her story, and it was the love of _her _life that was offering the one thing she'd longed for more than anything else in life.

His heart.

As the snowflakes continued to fall and swirl around them, he lowered himself down onto one knee before her and took both of her hands into his own. Bella gasped as tears once again gathered in her eyes and she captured her trembling lip between her teeth.

"Isabella Marie Swan, you are, and have always been, the love of my life. Tomorrow is Christmas, and all I want for Christmas this year, and every year for the rest of our lives, is _you_. Will you please marry me and do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Tears streamed down Bella's face as she struggled to contain her emotions. She wanted to squeal and laugh and cry all at the same time...so she did.

"Yes...Yes I will marry you!"

Edward's laughter joined her own as he stood and swooped her in his arms and spun her around as he crashed his lips into hers. The squeals and cheers of their friends and loved ones from the entrance to the building forced them to pull apart as they laughed again.

"IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME! NOW GET YOUR BUNS INSIDE, IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE!" Emmett's voice boomed through the air.

"For the love of God," Rosalie griped as she whacked him in the back of the head and pushed him towards the door. "The only reason you want to go back inside because they're serving dinner."

"Hey Bells!" Emmett yelled, drawing Bella's attention once again. "You owe me ten years of Christmas kisses baby doll...see you under the mistletoe!"

Edward and Bella snickered as he picked up her clutch from where it had fallen on the ground and they shook their heads as they walked back toward the building hand in frozen hand, her left held in his right over his heart, and their arms around each other. Both of them chilled to the core, their teeth chattering, but their hearts bursting with warmth and love for one another. Each time they glanced at each other, a wide grin would spread across their faces and he'd raise her hand to his lips and kiss her still bare ring finger in a silent promise to have it adorned with a ring as soon as possible.

As they approached the threshold leading into the ballroom, they were greeted with a sea of smiling faces all chanting one word.

Kiss.

Bella snickered as she looked up at the bundle of mistletoe hanging above their heads and shifted her gaze to Edward. He smiled and winked at her as he drew her into his arms. A moment later, he dipped her dramatically over his arm and kissed the ever living hell out of her, much to the amusement and delight of all the onlookers as they erupted into applause and cheers. The sound of which made both of them laugh as he stood them back up straight and ended the kiss with a series of three chaste pecks.

"Merry Christmas, love," he said as he gazed down at her and silently thanked every deity known to man for granting him the only wish he'd had every single night since the moment he'd realized she was everything he hadn't known he'd both wanted and needed his entire life.

As Bella spotted Alice and Jasper wink at her and then grin at each other, she chuckled and shook her head, instantly knowing how it came to be that they had both managed to find themselves at an annual function that neither of them had attended in years...and silently thanked them for it as she looked back up at Edward and beamed brilliantly.

"A very Merry Christmas, _indeed_."

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**A/N: Reviews are awesome...we all love them, we can't deny it LOL. Leave some...please, thank you, and Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones!**


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